Jessica Grant is my new favourite

The final reader at this weekend's Calgary Blow-Out, St. John's native Jessica Grant blew me away with her witty, quick and quirky style.

"The first piece I'm going to read will take about five minutes, and then I'm going to read a second piece which will take about eight minutes.. just so you'll know exactly what is going to happen"

She began her first story, which she thinks, no, she is sure is the first chapter of a novel. We meet a woman who's pet tortoise Winnifred has died. She thinks it has died because Winnifred's head doesn't poke out. After deliberating, she wraps Winnifred in five paper bags and throws her in the garbage bin over the railing. She calls her friend to say that she doesn't have to look after Winnifred anymore, Winnifred is dead.
She arrives at the airport, and while waiting to board remembers hearing that sometimes tortoise's hearts can beat very slowly, about once and hour. Maybe Winniffred wasn't dead! But is dying now in the dumpster... should she go home?
But she can't miss her plane, she has to go see her father who is in a comma, no a coma. She made that mistake yesterday when writing an e-mail. Perhaps Winnifred is in a comma, not a coma. She is in a pause between heart-beats.....

I LOVE it. that's the basic action of the story but the details and tone were hilarious and bittersweet.

Jessica Grant's most recent publication is Making Light of Tragedy Porcupine’s Quill, 2004.